In three sleeps (the way we count down around here) we will be leaving for Spirit West Coast.   This is our third year going and the kids are excited to go and so are Walter and I. 

Today has been a big day of preparing the food.   Walter and I do the cooking for the event and this year we are cooking for about 30 people.  We cooked 10 lbs of ground beef for spaghetti sauce which we will eat on Wednesday night.   We’ve also cooked about 30 lbs of ground beef that needed to be cooked and frozen to use at a later date or it would go bad and just need to be thrown away.   Tomorrow morning we will be cooking about more ground beef for taco salads which we will eat on Friday afternoon. 

Tonight I was getting ready to do some griping.  But I had to take a step back and realize who we are doing this for.   There’s a little bit of doing it for ourselves, a little bit of pride that we have to keep pushing down because we’ve got cooking for a group down to a pretty good science.   We are doing it for the kids, because on they are a great group of kids and I enjoy getting to know them.   We are doing it be able to go see David Crowder Band,  Brandon Heath , Mercy Me and of course everyone in the family is excited to see Toby Mac.  But really the real reason we are doing this is to serve the Lord. 

We will be a little sad to leave Echo for a few days, but we know she will be taken good care of by Jackie.

Each year gets a little bit easier to go.  The kids are older so they are less work.  We know what to expect, unlike that very first year.  That first night as we were trying to go to sleep I told Walter that we were getting a hotel room the rest of the weekend because I just couldn’t handle it.  Now we know what to expect and pack accordingly. 

Just a few more things to get done.  We need to get ID bracelets for the kids in case anything happens and finish packing clothes for everyone. 

Monterey here we come!

Tomorrow you turn four.  I know I say this every year but I don’t know how it’s going by so fast.   It seems like just yesterday you were placed in my arms.  A beautiful newborn.  I remember asking Grandma to go and get me a pink night gown for you since you looked so much like your brother.  But I think right away I knew that you were going to be different, you were going to change my heart and my life in wonderful ways.  

My dearest Becca, it took me a little bit longer to fall in love with you than I thought.  I think part of that was because of the miscarriage we had between you and your brother.  I was scared.  In fact I was so scared that I was going to loose you I didn’t take the time to enjoy every moment of my pregnancy with you.  I was scared when I found out that you were a girl.  Not being a “girly-girl” myself I didn’t know what to do with you.   I was actually a little disappointed that you weren’t a boy during that first ultrasound.

Please, my little Princess, don’t think that this confession means that I don’t love you or that I love your brother more.   Nothing could be farther from the truth.   Your daddy taught me that I was worth loving, your brother taught me the extreem love of a mother and a child, but my dear one, you helped me learn how to love myself, the person that God created.  I would say that the lesson you taught me is most important.  

Rebecca, sweetheart, you are a wonder.   You  bring laughter to our family with your sense of humor.  I love when you tell your favorite joke.   Your little voice asking  “Why don’t bears where pants?”   and you wait for us to ask “Why?”  And then you shout with joy “Because they have bare butts….get it”  and then you just laugh and laugh and laugh.    You also bring a softness, a gentleness to out family that we didn’t have before.  Just by being a girl your brother and daddy are a little less rough and a little more tender hearted than before. 

Becca you are a princess.   You tell us often enough.   When trying to get you to wear pants you will tell me “Princesses only where dresses”.   And when asked who the king is you will tell us that “Jesus is the King and I’m his princess”   your Gigi book has made an impact on you, but you also know it’s truth. 

As I sit here, thinking that exactly 4 years ago I had no clue how my life was going to change the next morning, but oh so grateful that my life did change.   You fill my heart with so many emotions.  You make me joyous when I see you learn and watch your zest for life.  You can also frustrate me, with your will that at times unbendable.   But I know that will serve you well in the future.   You are definately not a follower in life.  You are a leader.   You grab the car of life by the steering wheel and just go for it.

My child, I love you.  I’m so glad that you are my daughter.   Remember that as you grow older.   No matter what, be secure in the fact that I love you so much it hurts.